My first soapbox

Pregnancy is a beautiful phenomenon. I realize that most people are aware of that, but as I go through each stage I am completely in awe of how God's greatness is shown through this process. No matter how much I know that it's truly a miracle, I am still amazed at each little kick that I feel inside, each time I hear my baby's heart beat- even the annoying things amaze me because I realize that there is a little miracle going on inside. I have said over and over, I don't see how you can go through this experience and not know that there is a God who knows us so intricately and has woven us together with such purpose. I am in awe.

So here's today's soapbox: I am also in awe of another phenomenon that occurs during pregnancy- albeit a completely different and much less inspiring form of awe. Why is it that as soon as conception occurs, people think it's okay to start giving their opinion and saying things that under non-pregnant circumstances a person with any shred of decency or social awareness would NEVER say? There is obviously a difference between friends saying certain things and strangers (or relatives that you see twice a year). A friend has a certain level of trust that is appropriate...but then the lady that you just met in the soup aisle at Target...why does she get a say?! Everything from the amount of weight you have gained to your financial decisions post-pregnancy to your anesthetic choices to the name of your baby is up for discussion by everyone! Here is a list of questions/statements that I have encountered during pregnancy and how I would like to respond..but I don't:

Stranger: Wow- you're huge! Are you having twins?!
Real Response: Nope just one- he's a big guy. Tee hee.
Desired Response: Wow- you're huge too! Might want to lay off those cheeseburgers. At least I have an excuse.

Bald Stranger: So when are you due?
Me: October.
Bald Stranger: (with shocked look on his face and eyes rolling) Wow. Okay.
Desired Response-
Me: So when did your hair start falling out?
Bald Stranger: It doesn't fall out, I voluntarily shave my head.
Me: Wow. Okay.

Distant family member that I hardly ever talk to: So what are you going to name your baby?
Me: We're not sure yet...but I think we're going to keep it a surprise until the baby is here.
Distant Family Member: Well, just as long as you don't name him something and then call him by his middle name, you'll be fine. I hate when parents do that.
Me: (Awkward smile)
Desired Response by me: You know what I hate when parents do? Name their kid (insert name of distant family member that I hardly ever talk to).

Walmart Cashier: So when is your baby due?
Me: October.
WalMart cashier: I'm glad you said that, I wasn't really sure if you were pregnant or not.
Me: (awkward smile)
Desired response by me: Then why would ask me?

Stranger: So are you getting an epidural?
Me: I'm not sure. I'm doing a lot of research on all of my options.
Stranger: (with big eyes and a face that indicates the person thinks I'm a freak) Oh girl, that's what you think now, but it's TERRIBLE. You're going to want your epidural. You should sign up for it now.
My soapbox: So if you were only going to shoot down my response, then why did you ask me? Asking the question implies that the person has choices, but by your response you're indicating that I shouldn't have a choice. And to further my point from above- is it okay to ask a non-pregnant stranger about their invasive medical procedures? Would it be okay for me to ask, "so when is your next colonoscopy" or "so do you prefer to use tampons or pads" ? Probably not.

Not that I want to sound too jaded because there are highlights to being pregnant as well. People give you that sweet smile that says "I know what you're going through- isn't it amazing?!" Some people offer you their chairs when you have to stand for 30 minutes at your gate at the airport. It really is a beautiful time and there are far more terribly kind people than there are terrible rude people. And hey, I learn that once you go through a full pregnancy, your level of modesty goes down substantially, so maybe by the time I'm through I'll be the person that stops pregnant ladies in the grocery store and wants to talk about previously socially inappropriate topics...