As I enter the last few weeks of my first pregnancy, I am drawn to explore yet one more facet of the phenomenon of carrying a child. I cannot believe that I am almost done being pregnant. In some ways I can't believe it's almost over because I can't believe I'm old enough to have a baby...and in some ways it feels like it's been the longest 9 months ever. Either way I have loved(almost)every minute of it. However it is about to come to a close and a new page is about to be turned (cue the hopeful, upbeat music). But I do promise that I have more content in my brain other than just random and opinionated thoughts about being pregnant..so you can look forward to that.
One of the last and final pregnancy frontiers that I would like to cover in these last 2-3 weeks of being a knocked up member of society is the stark contrast between mixed conversations between couples that HAVE had babies and couples that have not had babies. It's a fun social experiment to be sure.
I will start by saying that I am not always a very appropriate person- but usually not on purpose. I'm surprised that my wonderful husband of 5 1/2 years has not already died of embarassment from many of the things I have said. I work in a job where I conduct sexual harassment investigations on a regular basis, so we can just leave up to your own imaginations things that I say on a daily and professional basis. With all of that being said, I have not usually had a problem talking about taboo subjects and usually that works to the chagrin of my very appropriate husband. But one thing I have noticed about pregnancy is the difference in conversations that can be had between couples that have had babies and couples that haven't- particularly dads.
All of our friends have had babies. We are one of the last to have a child with only a few couple friends who are still footloose and fancy-free, so we have heard all about how each of our non-footloose friends have dilated, each of their labors in great detail and all of the gory details that go into this miracle called childbirth. Somewhere along the way we became desensitized to words like "uterus" "mucous plug" and "colostrum". However we forget that some people haven't. Case in point, the other day we were out with a couple that has not had children and I proceeded to explain that I can't lay on my back when I sleep any more since my uterus could press onto some artery and cause certain and immediate death. The second I said the "u" word, the footloose husband's eyes got really big and his face turned a little red..and there was an awkward silence- which I broke by saying "Oops I said uterus." Nice save.
Now take a non-footloose husband. He has gone through the dr's appointments, birthing classes, the breastfeeding classes. He has watched countless child births in class and likely even been forced to watch a c-section. Gone is the taboo of calling "girly parts" by their rightful name. I saw this played out while sitting with my sister and brother-in-law who have had two children of their own. I felt no shame in asking- in front of my male brother-in-law mind you- about the art of breast feeding, engorged breasts, baby latching...and he listened like we were talking about the weather or a recipe or something. My sister even said "now what's that foremilk stuff called." To which he confidently and without embarassment replied "colostrum."
So a stark difference and just another transformation that occurs during pregnancy. So say it proudly men- Uterus! Cervix! After birth! Mucous plug!
Holla out there to all of the uber involved husbands who care enough to go with their wives through this process as engaged and proactive daddy's. You know more about all of this stuff than you ever cared to know because you care so much about a lovely little mama who is carrying a tiny miracle that you already love more than you ever thought you could. You're officially "the man".
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